Beauty of Writing

The Beauty of Writing..................

WOW, so I know I just pop up and don't blog for months, but I always make mental notes or pull out a pen, paper and start writing. I take pictures of my journeys and accomplishments. I haven't hung around the same people or done,the things I use to do. I want to see things in a different view and different atmosphere. 
I have lost many friends along my journey. Just when you think you have no more tears left something and someone you love is gone. Each death is a different feeling, a different loss.
Writing is where I can express myself, things I want to scream out on social media, but some things are not meant for every place circulating in space.  People may not agree and have the right and I am not looking for justification, but I will always be a voice, I didn't study Humanitarian for no reason. This is why I have a blog. My blog is used to say what the fuck I want to say and how I want to say it, without sugar-coating shit.
Now, What makes are brain tick, what makes us do the things we do? There will never be a straight answer or conclusion, theories and IDC how many studies that been conducted. We do everything for reasons.
I have gone to particular places for particular reasons and trying to determine if environmental factors play part in our behavior or play part of what makes us react the way we do.  OF COURSE, it doesn't take a Scientist to figure it out. LOL.
I will always determine a cause by the way people treat me...whether it is the texture of my hair or reflection of skin tone (HELL NO, I am NOT going there on BLM), but I look more so comparing; regions, cultures, religion, environments, and just people in general. There is always going to be a difference and to those who have never explore or wander will forever be lost.
I am so City, so East Coast, and sometimes downright hood! So to visit Midwest was nerve-racking, but curious. I always hear that I am such a people person, where sometimes I cannot stand being around people but I think the person that says that, sees deeper in me, where if I am not around people, I feel a lack of sensation. People have always just came up to me and just start talking. I treat people accordingly. If you act like you want no bother, same. If you act ignorant, I'm going to give you my ass to kiss. If you act like you did not see me, I clearly see you and twist up my lips. Don't let me catch you taking a peek because those twisted lips can turn to a quick fake ass smile in a heartbeat.
I started back going on dates and I been known that single life is for me so talking to me about relationship and love is not one of my biggest topic. I try things and if I don't like it, I don't try it again...
Ok, I am lying. I don't mean to try it again, but I have just had to see if it had the same affect/effect.
Writing is a stress reliever, poetry, eye-opener,analyzing, thrilling, and interesting. I have not read a good book since I got sick of reading during college. I have wrote books that I have still not published and it will forever be an artifact. So when that day comes and goes, I know my family will find writings and read how I truly felt and my heart is always aiming for good intentions, regardless how rude I can be.
Remember to live like it is your last day and do it your way. Stop trying please everyone except for you. Just do u! Believe in something and do the unbelievable, my only difference is I pray several times a day and I thank God for forgiveness.

**This writing was done last year. I am just getting a chance to prepare & share**

I dedicate this to my-close friends that I consider family; May you continue to rest well my beauties; Dana Cam, John, &  Liv. 💔💔💔💔